letsee if i can remember this whole thing...
A man is going on a business trip. Because it will be a long trip, he will be away from home for a long period of time (duh!). Now this man had a very horny wife, whom he was worried might cheat on him.
So the man sets out to find something for his wife in a sex toys store. He looks and looks, but nothing seems good enough for his wife. The blowup dolls seem to much like men, the dildoes seem to fake. Finally he talks to the store manager.
"Isn't there anything better" he says
"Well sir," says the manager, " I do have this one thing, a voodoo dildoe"
"What in tha world is that?" says the man
"Let me demonstrate" replies the manager, taking out a wooden box with ancient carvings of very interesting lookin figures on it.
He opens it, and inside there is a wooden dildoe. "Voodoo dildoe, door!" says the man. The dildoe flies our of the box, over to the door, and starts banging the shit out of the keyhole. "Voodoo dildoe, back in your box" says the manager, before the door breaks. So the dildoe flies back into the box.
"How much for the dildoe," asks the man
"I'm sorry sir," replies the manager, "its not for sale"
However, after some haggling, he manages to buy it for $700. Taking it home to his wife, he presents it to her. "Here is a voodoo dildoe" he says, "if you get horny while I'm gone, just say, "voodoo dildoe, my pussy".
So the man leaves on his trip. Around the second day, the wife is already feelin horny. So she takes out the wooden box, opens it, and says, "Voodoo dildoe, my pussy"
She has the best time of her life that night. After 6 consecutive orgasms (err iunno if thats possible, but itsa joke), she decides, "enough". However, her husband forgot to tell her how to stop the dildoe. She tries pulling it out, but the harder she pulls, the harder it screws. Eventually she decides to go to the hospital.
She drives on the road, still being done by the voodoo dildoe. Not able to control her ride, she swerves across the road until she is eventually stopped by a cop.
"What's the matter ma'am, are you drunk?" asks the cop
"No, " she replies, "I'm being screwed by a voodoo dildoe and I don't know how to stop it!"
The police officer looks at her like she must have just told him the stupidest story he'd every heard, and then says,
"Voodoo Dildoe my ass!"
damm that took 20mins 2 type it...
A man is going on a business trip. Because it will be a long trip, he will be away from home for a long period of time (duh!). Now this man had a very horny wife, whom he was worried might cheat on him.
So the man sets out to find something for his wife in a sex toys store. He looks and looks, but nothing seems good enough for his wife. The blowup dolls seem to much like men, the dildoes seem to fake. Finally he talks to the store manager.
"Isn't there anything better" he says
"Well sir," says the manager, " I do have this one thing, a voodoo dildoe"
"What in tha world is that?" says the man
"Let me demonstrate" replies the manager, taking out a wooden box with ancient carvings of very interesting lookin figures on it.
He opens it, and inside there is a wooden dildoe. "Voodoo dildoe, door!" says the man. The dildoe flies our of the box, over to the door, and starts banging the shit out of the keyhole. "Voodoo dildoe, back in your box" says the manager, before the door breaks. So the dildoe flies back into the box.
"How much for the dildoe," asks the man
"I'm sorry sir," replies the manager, "its not for sale"
However, after some haggling, he manages to buy it for $700. Taking it home to his wife, he presents it to her. "Here is a voodoo dildoe" he says, "if you get horny while I'm gone, just say, "voodoo dildoe, my pussy".
So the man leaves on his trip. Around the second day, the wife is already feelin horny. So she takes out the wooden box, opens it, and says, "Voodoo dildoe, my pussy"
She has the best time of her life that night. After 6 consecutive orgasms (err iunno if thats possible, but itsa joke), she decides, "enough". However, her husband forgot to tell her how to stop the dildoe. She tries pulling it out, but the harder she pulls, the harder it screws. Eventually she decides to go to the hospital.
She drives on the road, still being done by the voodoo dildoe. Not able to control her ride, she swerves across the road until she is eventually stopped by a cop.
"What's the matter ma'am, are you drunk?" asks the cop
"No, " she replies, "I'm being screwed by a voodoo dildoe and I don't know how to stop it!"
The police officer looks at her like she must have just told him the stupidest story he'd every heard, and then says,
"Voodoo Dildoe my ass!"
damm that took 20mins 2 type it...
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