HIP HOP LIFESTYLE

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Voodoo Dildoe

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Voodoo Dildoe

    letsee if i can remember this whole thing...


    A man is going on a business trip. Because it will be a long trip, he will be away from home for a long period of time (duh!). Now this man had a very horny wife, whom he was worried might cheat on him.

    So the man sets out to find something for his wife in a sex toys store. He looks and looks, but nothing seems good enough for his wife. The blowup dolls seem to much like men, the dildoes seem to fake. Finally he talks to the store manager.

    "Isn't there anything better" he says
    "Well sir," says the manager, " I do have this one thing, a voodoo dildoe"
    "What in tha world is that?" says the man
    "Let me demonstrate" replies the manager, taking out a wooden box with ancient carvings of very interesting lookin figures on it.

    He opens it, and inside there is a wooden dildoe. "Voodoo dildoe, door!" says the man. The dildoe flies our of the box, over to the door, and starts banging the shit out of the keyhole. "Voodoo dildoe, back in your box" says the manager, before the door breaks. So the dildoe flies back into the box.

    "How much for the dildoe," asks the man
    "I'm sorry sir," replies the manager, "its not for sale"

    However, after some haggling, he manages to buy it for $700. Taking it home to his wife, he presents it to her. "Here is a voodoo dildoe" he says, "if you get horny while I'm gone, just say, "voodoo dildoe, my pussy".

    So the man leaves on his trip. Around the second day, the wife is already feelin horny. So she takes out the wooden box, opens it, and says, "Voodoo dildoe, my pussy"

    She has the best time of her life that night. After 6 consecutive orgasms (err iunno if thats possible, but itsa joke), she decides, "enough". However, her husband forgot to tell her how to stop the dildoe. She tries pulling it out, but the harder she pulls, the harder it screws. Eventually she decides to go to the hospital.

    She drives on the road, still being done by the voodoo dildoe. Not able to control her ride, she swerves across the road until she is eventually stopped by a cop.

    "What's the matter ma'am, are you drunk?" asks the cop
    "No, " she replies, "I'm being screwed by a voodoo dildoe and I don't know how to stop it!"

    The police officer looks at her like she must have just told him the stupidest story he'd every heard, and then says,

    "Voodoo Dildoe my ass!"



    damm that took 20mins 2 type it...
    May 21st., 1999
    September 13, 1996
    March 9th, 1997

    April 11, 2006 -- REST IN PEACE BIG PROOF

    Why am I dying to live, If I'm just living to die...

  • #2
    fuckin funny
    poor cop
    Should I Care??? Make Me Believe It

    shouts to NoFear for my current avatar

    #Mercury

    Comment


    • #3
      hahahahhaa.... omg! that's scary!! hahahah

      good one :P
      It's for MIGH not for Might ... no spelling mistakes (I'm a girl, btw...)

      Comment


      • #4
        haha, i remember that joke ::
        "Anything worth doing, is worth overdoing"
        "A man with nothing, ain't got nothing to lose"
        2011-2012 Detroit Lions = Playoffs
        \m/\m/

        Comment


        • #5
          Lol
          This is ten percent luck, twenty percent skill
          Fifteen percent concentrated power of will
          Five percent pleasure, fifty percent pain
          And a hundred percent reason to remember the name!
          - Fort Minor

          Comment

          Post ad widget 300x250

          Collapse

          LATEST POSTS

          Collapse

          Topics Statistics Last Post
          Started by nvvnqjzw, Today, 07:09 AM
          0 responses
          2 views
          0 likes
          Last Post nvvnqjzw  
          Started by Deborahlanker, Today, 05:23 AM
          0 responses
          2 views
          0 likes
          Last Post Deborahlanker  
          Started by Bynarden, Yesterday, 11:44 AM
          1 response
          3 views
          0 likes
          Last Post BrookeDavis  
          Started by Deborahlanker, Today, 04:52 AM
          0 responses
          1 view
          0 likes
          Last Post Deborahlanker  
          Started by Deborahlanker, 08-25-2020, 11:22 PM
          1 response
          4 views
          0 likes
          Last Post Rapsodia  
          Started by Heridan, Today, 02:39 AM
          2 responses
          5 views
          0 likes
          Last Post Rapsodia  
          Started by Deborahlanker, Today, 03:54 AM
          0 responses
          2 views
          0 likes
          Last Post Deborahlanker  
          Started by One_Mic_xxx, 12-27-2018, 05:39 PM
          13 responses
          25 views
          0 likes
          Last Post Rapsodia  
          Started by Deborahlanker, 09-22-2020, 02:43 AM
          1 response
          5 views
          0 likes
          Last Post Rapsodia  
          Started by wahoge, Today, 02:50 AM
          0 responses
          2 views
          0 likes
          Last Post wahoge
          by wahoge
           
          Working...
          X