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First Ever Elonzo Audio...

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  • First Ever Elonzo Audio...

    so i decided to do an audio a few weeks ago over the "Thiefs Theme" instrumental...
    and i realized how fuckin gay my voice sounds...so there aint no need to diss it...i need to work on it and stop trying to develop an accent...i don't know why i sound like that...i definatly don't talk like that...but whatever...

    try not to concentrate on the voice but on the flow and lyrics and shit...i would like some feedback...on it...

    http://www.soundclick.com/bands/3/elonzomusic.htm

    here are the lyrics


    (Verse 1)
    Grew up, started as momma’s lil boy,
    Spittin Bombs that only Osama could deploy,
    Never scream for Joy, us lil kids had it hard,
    Pray to God for all the shit I Can’t afford,
    Too young to get a job, so we had to rob,
    A mini mafia but we had a smaller mob,
    No hair on our balls but we was runnin from the cops,
    Out the shops, used to hide around our block,
    Escaped the lot, one day we heard a couple shots,
    Cant take no more, I wondered when Trouble Stops,
    I’m 17 but now the drama still continues,
    Wanna rap further, perform at all the venues,
    Streamin my emotions through my soul to the wire,
    Crowds big as oceans with a goal to spit fire
    Fuck crime I wanna live my life to rhyme
    Make my debut and explode on the mic like a mine,
    This is the…

    (Chorus)
    The thief's theme, play me at night, they won't act right
    Understandable smooth shit, that murderers move wit
    The thief's theme, play me at night, they won't act right
    Understandable smooth shit, that murderers move wit
    The thief's theme, play me at night, they won't act right
    Understandable smooth shit, that murderers move wit
    The thief's theme, play me at night, they won't act right
    Understandable smooth shit, that murderers move wit

    (Verse 2)
    Had an incident but I can’t remember right,
    It was a normal friday on a cold December night,
    Walkin to mcdonalds to buy a bite to eat,
    A dude robbed my chain, said I gotta Fight to keep,
    I felt the heat, for this beefin to take place,
    Knocked him down and knee’d him In the face,
    Reached in my pocket and keyed him in the throat,
    Left him on the floor Bleedin in the snow,
    Just right then a cop drove down the road,
    Seen a flash and a similar sound arose,
    I turned to run but didn’t know where to hide,
    Across the park to a house and stared inside,
    It was empty so I entered the back door,
    To my surprise out jumped a crackwhore,
    She screamed and the sirens got nearer,
    Heard them stop, and the scream got clearer,
    Shit…
    Last edited by Cain; 10-15-2004, 11:05 AM.
    Cain is for Charlie, and Delta is for Cain


  • #2
    good lyrics nice song like it
    take a look at my lyrics 2
    FoR ShiZzLe My WiZzLeS ThIs iS ThE pLoT LiStEn Up...YoU BiZzLeS FoRgOt SLiZzEL DoEs NoT GiVe a FUcK!!!!!!



    thanks to T&T for the avy

    Comment


    • #3
      thanks...will look at yours when i got some spare time...i'm a bit busy now
      Cain is for Charlie, and Delta is for Cain

      Comment


      • #4
        Lyrics aren't bad mate, i think you need to put more emotion in ya voice cos ya sounded a bit monotone, but yea, good effort for first audio

        ¿

        Comment


        • #5
          it wuz ight but i wasn't likin it i heard lots better

          6/10

          peace
          (NO HATE)
          ...I sniff Ajax, drink chlorox
          Spit fresh, every breath till a lung pops...

          Comment


          • #6
            no that's fine...i know my voice needs tons of modifications...but i was trying to work on lyrics...if you don't like it that's fine...but thnks for your comment
            Cain is for Charlie, and Delta is for Cain

            Comment

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