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Ballad of a dead loner

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  • Ballad of a dead loner

    Yo heres a lil re-work of Pacs "ballad of a dead soulja", i know alot of y'all dont like reworks (my last one, "ambitions as a rhymer" got slept on hard) but im such a fucking big Pac fan, his rhymes influence my stlye so much that i find myself writing one of these every now and then. so if you dont wanna reply its cool, but feedback is always appreciated.The rhyme fits pacs flow but iv pretty much changed every word and the content is completly different.Its only verse 1

    PEACE

    The plan, to catch attention spans from my whole family/
    Make em see, what the world would be like without me/
    All my road doggs, they skated-off left me solo/
    Now im so low, my smiles are rare as shit from a dodo/
    Did you know though, i will get revenge on your arse/
    You will pay for the sins that you made in the past/
    I kidnapped the last bitch that laughed at me/
    Swore i saw the devil as i lubed her arse with vaseline/
    She got treated like a dog on a tight leash/
    Made her lick herself clean after she pissed on the news sheets/
    Babe tried to run away, who could blame her?/
    Told her the more she screamed-the more id mutilate her/
    Damn right im a mad man/
    Chainsaws strapped to my legs so i can kill with the can-can/
    Sick of this lonesome life, when will it be over?/
    Tell me can you hear it? - The Ballad Of A Dead Loner//
    The only thing worse than the wretched pain in my mouth is the excrement spewing from yours-Stewie Griffen

    ONLY GOD CAN JUDGE ME

    R.I.P ~ Tupac Shakur-my biggest musical inspiration…you are missed everyday

  • #2
    that was pretty tight dawg.

    good turn around.
    Battle Record 25 - 6.
    Official Winner of FT1.
    http://www.dferecordz.com/gru.jpg
    A coward dies a thousand deaths,
    a soldier only dies but one.

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    • #3
      I was playin that song when I saw your mesage.

      nice work.
      WILD DUDES RULE & GOODBYE FOREVER

      Bleek's Bedroom Buddies
      Sour Bleek
      Sweet Bleek
      Mild Bleek


      Coming soon, Sleep Over Party!!!!! THE FIRST BLEEK'S BEDROOM BUDDIES ALBUM!

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      • #4
        thats not Pac style.
        but I aint heard the original song

        started off deep,
        but the middle is just some rage and imaginary violence.

        i will get revenge on your arse
        man it would funny as fuck if Pac ever said 'Arse'
        -ma homeys ed whip yo arse- ha

        i dont know what to make of your rhyme, it just lacks direction
        -the loner feeling doesnt quite come through
        this joke : how many hiphoppers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? .................. three, one to screw in the new lightbulb, and two to argue over how much better the old one was.

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        • #5
          why mehn

          hehy mehn that was aight ... its kool its aight

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