HIP HOP LIFESTYLE

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

"A Moment in Time"

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • "A Moment in Time"

    It was a day like no other, but started out routine
    Debatin' the sun light in my eyes tryin' to boot-me
    Out of bed, so I can finally greet-the-day
    Smilin' upon the time, it's better to meet-this-way
    Saturday shows blarin' from the TV speakers
    Parents fightin' 'bout my sister, but the words wouldn't reach-her
    So the anger got directed toward eachother, yes intended
    Once the argument started, no one could predict the endin'
    Changin their attitudes along with the subject
    Discriminatin' words flyin' through the room, and I couldn't duck-it
    Walkin' through the house pluggin' my ears, but my finger's sour*
    Clock tickin, as time moves on to the next hour
    'Playin' a string instrument,' 'cause man their flaws-were-strummin'
    When the unthinkable happend - no one saw-it-comin'
    My father - my hero- the man-of-the-house
    Took a forceful grip with his hand-on-his-spouse
    Grabbin' her hair and neck, an threw her against-the-wall
    Stumblin' for her balance, I could predict-her-fall
    Police invloved, and the room suddenly was spinnin'-hits
    Witnessing it all - my child eyes were no longer innocent

    Chorus (2x):

    A second, a minute, a wrongful choice
    An hour, a day, another lost voice
    A month, a week, a word spoken-in-rhyme
    Everything can change in a single moment-in-time

    Handcuffs surrounding his hands as he gets hauled-away
    Tellin' us when he leaves he'd like a call-a-day
    Anger flustering me, but fear for his capabilities
    Scared he'd come back mad, and maybe-killin'-me
    Phones calls as expected, it was hard to forgive-him
    But my undercover love for him caused me to forgive-me
    3 months and no visit, but at the time I didn't care
    Lookin' through photo albumbs, a happy family never seen there
    Sick to to my stomach - foster home possibilities
    Meetings with social services, all this stress slowly killin'-me
    But soon after that, my dad came to see us for a visit
    Went out to dinner and his apologies were exquisit
    Concentratin' on my family, I realized I still love-him
    Improtant infulences, no on can go above-him
    My anger and hate of the situation now goes silent
    But never forgettin' we were the victims of domestic violence

    Chorus (2x):

    A second, a minute, a wrongful choice
    An hour, a day, another lost voice
    A month, a week, a word spoken-in-rhyme
    Everything can change in a single moment-in-time

    Movin' out, buyin' a separate house-to-live
    His love for his children - he no longer had a spouse-to-give
    Supportin' himself, while carin' for his children
    The independence he now had, his character slowly built-him
    Only the problems we had were the ones that shook-him
    Priorities on us, but of course he met another woman
    She had a son, same age as me, and interests
    It's as if God forgave us and we no longer had sins-stick
    Seein' my dad and her together - evil must have been restin'
    Her son and I got close - in no time we were best-friends
    Placin' a rhyme scheme to a melody-that-plays
    Providin' an escape of the awful memories-that-stay
    That day that replays changed my life in a way I couldn't-ask-for
    But out of their break-up, I got more than I could-of-asked-for
    It all feels different, when it's spoken-in-rhyme
    A lesson learned that anything can change in a moment-in-time
    Love, live life, proceed, progress

  • #2
    Pretty solid..had a nice feel, I'd work on brushing up the flow/lyrics a little, but overall pretty nice..I'll give you a 7.5/10.

    Comment


    • #3
      Yea, I really just used this rap as a way to vent my feelings, and kind of layed off the lryics a little bit.

      Uppin' on more feed, it's all appreciated.
      Love, live life, proceed, progress

      Comment


      • #4
        *Gets steaming mad*

        HOLD THE FUCK ON! Where's my rep?

        *Punches a wall*

        Comment


        • #5
          Uppin' for more feed.
          Love, live life, proceed, progress

          Comment


          • #6
            Uppin'.
            Love, live life, proceed, progress

            Comment


            • #7
              Wow. This is pretty ill, Symptom. I've noticed lately that it appears that you are findin' yourself to be better at writin' actual songs now. It seems to be coming natural now, right? I gotta work on mysongwritin' ability for sure. If you can actually perfrom this over a tight beat then that's ill. Keep on goin' with this shit for sure.

              Story goes really well together - all the actual events happenin' with the action bein' depicted, and your own emotion and other people's emotion bein' depicted - all put into a song with nice rhymin'. I can see some Nas influence here. Is the woman's son David since you mentioned that he's your best friend?

              My advice would be to keep on gettin' better at what you're good at. If you wanna get better at other shit as well, you can do that, but it's not necessary unless you're missin' requirements - you definitely need those.

              Peace.
              P!

              Comment


              • #8
                ^Yea, he is indeed David.

                I appreciate the feedback.

                Uppin'.
                Love, live life, proceed, progress

                Comment


                • #9
                  . . .
                  Love, live life, proceed, progress

                  Comment

                  Post ad widget 300x250

                  Collapse

                  LATEST POSTS

                  Collapse

                  Topics Statistics Last Post
                  Started by vibration, Today, 12:21 AM
                  0 responses
                  1 view
                  0 likes
                  Last Post vibration  
                  Started by vibration, Today, 12:19 AM
                  0 responses
                  2 views
                  0 likes
                  Last Post vibration  
                  Started by Deborahlanker, Yesterday, 12:27 PM
                  0 responses
                  4 views
                  0 likes
                  Last Post Deborahlanker  
                  Started by Deborahlanker, Yesterday, 11:16 AM
                  0 responses
                  6 views
                  0 likes
                  Last Post Deborahlanker  
                  Started by Deborahlanker, Yesterday, 10:26 AM
                  0 responses
                  3 views
                  0 likes
                  Last Post Deborahlanker  
                  Started by Michenldlsan, 06-19-2019, 12:39 AM
                  5 responses
                  64 views
                  0 likes
                  Last Post davidwalker4152  
                  Started by qgjaplgs, Yesterday, 06:11 AM
                  0 responses
                  3 views
                  0 likes
                  Last Post qgjaplgs  
                  Started by FrankCobalt, 11-25-2020, 10:47 PM
                  1 response
                  4 views
                  0 likes
                  Last Post Doro
                  by Doro
                   
                  Started by FrankCobalt, 11-25-2020, 10:43 PM
                  1 response
                  3 views
                  0 likes
                  Last Post Doro
                  by Doro
                   
                  Started by toxiburn, Yesterday, 03:39 AM
                  0 responses
                  3 views
                  0 likes
                  Last Post toxiburn  
                  Working...
                  X