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Tha Moment

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  • Tha Moment

    Antartic,the moment frozen in time,collectin cob webs in my mind
    lethargic,blazed and drunk since watchin my father dyin
    I remember momma cryin,homey I'd be lyin
    if I said I didn't blame myself, put me in hell to forever dwell
    swimmin in whiskey,high as a kite flyin
    shoulda stayed by you,dad, instead of bein' a teen whinin
    100 fears, 100 fears and that number's climbin
    it's been 13 years, 13 years of daily dyin
    but I can't die, lord knows that I've been tryin

    I wish I had that moment back, damn I want that moment back
    shake yr hand like a grown ass man
    that was supposed to be tha plan
    I'm feelin scammed, damn I want that moment back


    All those pills I popped hopin' my heart would stop
    damn I was sure that shit would make me drop
    got me a gun, I flash it so you can call tha cops
    shoot it out wit em til my chest gets popped
    til I feel that burnin sensation, a new high I've copped
    til I see you again I aint never gonna stop
    and I hate God for makin yr life something lost
    I can't even look at a cross
    time to get sauced,cuz God's damned and I need a shot

    I wish I had that moment back, damn I want that moment back
    shake yr hand like a grown ass man
    that was supposed to be tha plan
    I'm feelin scammed, damn I want that moment back


    At times I want to die like Kurt Cobain
    put a gun in my mouth and blow out my brains
    at times, I want to spread tha pain
    open up on tha crowd,go on a shootin rampage
    all this sadness and rage,don't feel human,I should be locked in a cage
    like an animal with skill to kill for thrill at will, the urges rise and wane
    I think I'm goin insane, I think too much,gotta dull my brain
    drink you under tha table, I'm ready willing and able
    I'm unstable, white picket fence?please, that shit's a fable
    you be Cain and I'll be Abel,whatever it takes to end this pain

    I wish I had that moment back, damn I want that moment back
    shake yr hand like a grown ass man
    that was supposed to be tha plan
    I'm feelin scammed, damn I want that moment back
    KING SHEAMUS

  • #2
    i liked it. very emotional and well written. id like to hear this in audio
    Urban Krack
    Blog & Weekly Podcast. Check It Out & Support!
    www.urbankrack.blogspot.com

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    • #3
      Thanks a lot for the props, man. I'm glad you liked it. Once I get tha shit I need to do audio I'll definitely be doin this track.
      KING SHEAMUS

      Comment


      • #4
        bumpin for more feedback. Reps for constructive feedback.
        KING SHEAMUS

        Comment


        • #5
          nice. u definatly need audio for this. try a hook or chorus on there

          Comment


          • #6
            i ment a different one not the one u got there

            Comment


            • #7
              thanks for the feedback. repped
              KING SHEAMUS

              Comment


              • #8
                I was liking it, flow was good rhymes were cool, I liked how u went with 1 rhyme each verse, except da chorus wasnt catchy, if u make catchy hooks u be successful dats how 50 cent is successful he cant rap but he makes catchy hooks, i think it would sound betta on audio, I liked da concept very emotional nice drop man keep at it
                Southern Intellect

                Its The Southern TakeOver
                Cruz

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                • #9
                  ^^^^

                  repped
                  KING SHEAMUS

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    I'll read it in full tomorrow when I'm not so drunk. But I like the copped a new high line.
                    The Silver Tounge Troublemaker

                    I'm Kobe Bryant Ready

                    With This Ego I Can Stand Here In A Speedo And Get Looked At Like A Fuckin' Hero.


                    Got It?

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                    • #11
                      definitely would like to see this on audio. I enjoyed reading it..
                      maybe imrove a bit on structure and vocab but other then that,
                      i feel this piece. Interesting way of rhyming.. flow was pretty cool.
                      R.I.P Proof
                      ......
                      get higher, get higher i never retire
                      there is only two states to be in.. NSW & Stoned

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                      • #12
                        ^^^repped
                        KING SHEAMUS

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