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First Post--Read To See What All You Wish You Could Write...lol

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  • First Post--Read To See What All You Wish You Could Write...lol

    Hey tell me whatya think....Quite a Personal Song

    This ***** Betrayed me man..Read The Song and Reply..PLEASE REPLY AND TELL ME WHAT YA THINK COS IM TRYIN TO DEVELOP MY RHYMES!!!!

    This ***** Betrayed My Friendship..Rizzo..Yo Dead

    Betrayal:

    Ma rhymes are Biblical/non-Sensical really
    Speak to the Streets/Ones Who Feel Me
    No where I’ve been/Seen what I’ve done
    Claimin *****’s/provin to be number 1
    Takin yo life fo cash/Havin A Bash at y’all
    Who would have guessed my time to fall
    The Dictator who paid me/then betrayed me
    Life on this Street is hard as hell
    Standin tall reppin Brothers who Fell/
    In da struggle/Thug life t’ill I die
    Got ma mommy askin me why o why….
    Stick in at skool/make it outta here
    Thinkin back/fightin back the Tears
    Ive got something for you/thinking im weak
    Make it to the Top ***** reaching my peak.
    Ma chest is guarded with a vest/to block the lead headin fo my chest
    I commited the Crime/I’ve done my Time…or have I……/
    I wonder why I didn’t take the Advice/told it twice/
    Don’t Get involved/Ma raps have Evolved/
    Im the future or this game/rest of y’all *****z is tame
    Rhymin the same shit..tryin to call it yo’ own
    Ring..Ring..***** answer yo’ phone/
    It’s ma hit squad sent to end yo’life
    We don’t miss/takin the piss/Ragin Fits
    Been inside/told ma Lies/were was u wen I was bein beaten in Jail
    As a Friend ***** u a bitch…Ima kill you..I cant fail…..
    Remember this song bitch cos its yo’Grave Readin….
    Life is mine ***** am still breathin…………Bang…you aint……

    Talkin:
    Don’t push me bitch……..I’m on the Tip Of Destruction..Yo’Dead Bitch yo hear me..Rizzo..Yo’Dead…
    Watch you back *****….invest In a Vest……you gonny need it…Dead Man Walkin……….
    The AfterMath Forums is The Place To Be..*****aazzzz

  • #2
    yo rap was aight
    but i aint into that gansta bullshit
    so i really cant give critique it would be biast
    Ay-yo my murderous rap verbal attack is actual fact/
    Tactical tracks match perfectly with graphical stats/
    Half a you lack the magical dap of tragical rap/
    That tackles you back and shackles and laughs at you/
    That's...the mathematical madness I'm on, the savage, the strong/
    The marriage, a bond of havoc and song/
    This massacre's on as if Picasso laced you/
    There's lotsa hateful skeletons locked/
    in the closet of my castle of Grayskull/
    I'm possum at grade school, that's why I have to debate you/
    My raps are like Capel, slashin' your face, you/
    That's how a master degrades you/
    I'm battlin' Jesus (hay-soos) if he passes through my label
    I'm snatchin' his halo/
    God I pray that you send my father back as an angel/
    Language is fatal and it's hypnotizin'/
    I'm only emphasizin', I'm still all about business and enterprisin'/
    I'm super lyrical, a brain boosts the chemicals/
    That's used contenicals inside of my mental projectable/
    big pun-super lyrical
    he one of the best defenilty up there with tupac and biggie



    ..::battle record ::..
    ..::1-2 ::..
    ..::wins ::..
    ..:: lyrically compact::..
    ..:: losses::..
    ..:: amode::.. good battle
    ..:: king of kb::.. close

    [/CENTER]
    shout-out to the one of the best this board has seen shadygirl i'll miss ya
    your rhymes were killer keep ya head up

    Comment


    • #3
      It was ok. It's personal for you, so it's gonna mean more to you than anybody else who reads it naturally. Plus without hearin the flow, there's only so much you can tell. As far as straight lyrics go, it was decent.
      I'm synanomous with great
      The opposite of fake
      You probably want me to break,
      But that's NOT my fate...

      Battle cats battle back, with whack ass battle raps
      Catch a battle axe, bitch, battle that...

      These late night schemes might be pipe dreams
      But unless I give it a go, I'll never know

      313 Outlawz
      The Reality U Try Hidein (TRUTH)

      Comment

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