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Lost In Love (feedbakk motherfucka)

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  • Lost In Love (feedbakk motherfucka)

    I wrote this rhyme a while bakk when I got dumped by this girl. I thought it was weak, and todae, I was jess lookin' bakk on old lyrics and songs I made, and I thought it was pretty good actually. So rate this shit!! Tell me whatchu think!! Oh yah, and also, all tha *'s r in this rhyme cuz I blanked out names so I wouldn't get into ne shit lol. And actually, itz kinda tite cuz I wrote tha 1st verse when I was with her and tha rest when I wasn't.

    **** *********, Come here, Gimme ur hand we gotta talk
    Follow me here, boo, to tha park
    Hey boo, Do you promise to be faithful?
    Be there for me? Tha soul that I could relate to?
    Ever since tha 7th grade to now, this very second
    You've been more to me than jess a best friend
    I love u, I'm always thinkin' of u
    You're special to me, u ain't like these other girls
    Ur different from 'em cuz they're shit but I love u, girl
    Tha whole day I could jess kiss and hug u, girl
    I want u to be there for me when I'm old and grey
    I want u to have mah kids, I have so much to say
    that if I go on, it'll be an eternity
    I'm here for u so when u hurt, Turn to me
    cuz I'll alwaes be here to help ur problems
    I promise, Mah love for u won't die cuz itz tha strongest

    BUT YOU LIED TO ME, IT WAS ALL FUCKING LIES
    DAMMIT! I'M HERE PASSIN' GIRLS WHILE YOU'RE FUCKING GUYS
    I THOUGHT YOU MEANT WHAT U SAID! WAS IT TRUE?
    WAS IT THA FUCKING TRUTH?
    YOU THINK UR PLAYIN' *****S BUT THEY ALL FUCKING YOU


    Look me in tha eyes and tell me u really love me I love you
    BULL SHIT No, I really do
    No You fucked me, You screwed me
    You used me, You didn't mean a word that u told
    Yah, I did! Then what tha fuck r u doing with *-**?
    Hey, don't u remember that day
    that u and ***** didn't do shit but nay
    and nag at one another
    and that u swore to God u wouldn't go back out with eachother
    Oh yeah That's right, now u remember, Don't u?
    Ur goin' to hell cuz u broke a swear and mah soul to
    Wasn't I special? yah, but BUT NO!!
    I asked if u'd go bakk out with him and u said fuck no
    He cheated u, While I'm here doin' deeds for u
    It was suppose to be ME for U
    Now u ain't got shit to say, and ur gettin' all nervous
    Bitch, look me in tha eyes and tell me do I deserve this?
    No, u don't U made me feel like a punk and a jerk, bitch
    I tried fixin' shit and tryna work shit
    What happened? Tell me, Weren't we perfect?
    YESSLUT, WEREN'T WE PERFECT?

    BUT YOU LIED TO ME, IT WAS ALL FUCKING LIES
    DAMMIT! I'M HERE PASSIN' GIRLS WHILE YOU'RE FUCKING GUYS
    I THOUGHT YOU MEANT WHAT U SAID! WAS IT TRUE?
    WAS IT THA FUCKING TRUTH?
    YOU THINK UR PLAYIN' *****S BUT THEY ALL FUCKING YOU


    BUT YOU LIED TO ME, IT WAS ALL FUCKING LIES
    DAMMIT! I'M HERE PASSIN' GIRLS WHILE YOU'RE FUCKING GUYS
    I THOUGHT YOU MEANT WHAT U SAID! WAS IT TRUE?
    WAS IT THA FUCKING TRUTH?
    YOU THINK UR PLAYIN' *****S BUT THEY ALL FUCKING YOU




    thatz it. tell me whatchu think.
    Lyrikally Lost aka Fidel Kastrator


    http://invince.8m.net/dei2.gif

  • #2
    dat kinda reminds me of kim speshilt wen the grl answers bak. the first verse was very sweet i thought it was like a nice kinda love rap thin then i looked down then it was"BUT U LIED TO ME" I was like WOAH! but it was good.
    *~CHINK GIRL FO LIFE!*~

    http://sugadolls.homestead.com/files/sci21.gif

    http://www.angelfire.com/pa4/cooldoll/images/sil33.gif

    SPANK MEH!

    [color= red] GO ON, I DARE YA![/color]




    wheres ma Mr. Right?

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    • #3
      hmm, yeah, it kinda is like Kim lol
      Lyrikally Lost aka Fidel Kastrator


      http://invince.8m.net/dei2.gif

      Comment


      • #4
        Aiight,well heres what i think.....

        I liked the first verse, cuz although its was kinda simple it told the story and i could see the feeling in it, you didnt need to over complicate the vocab cuz the message was a real one.
        I felt the second verse was good but not as heartfelt as the first.

        Overall it was cool, i look back at my old shit sometimes and laugh at most of it, but when you record a real emotion like that it works at any age.keep posting dogg.

        PEACE
        The only thing worse than the wretched pain in my mouth is the excrement spewing from yours-Stewie Griffen

        ONLY GOD CAN JUDGE ME

        R.I.P ~ Tupac Shakur-my biggest musical inspiration…you are missed everyday

        Comment


        • #5
          tight shit

          i felt that, cause i know where ya comin from, keep that shit up
          Point Of No Return Ill Wayz And Dmote Ranks

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