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A Verse I Wrote For A Cutie.

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  • A Verse I Wrote For A Cutie.

    Before I start I know ya'll are gonna say "you rhymed to much" don't state the obvious I know I rhymed a lot judge on content. Or you can just bash me whatever's clever.



    [Start]

    I moderate my infatuation, knowing my limitation,
    Lost in fascination, keepin only to my immagnation,
    You and him a combination, so I play the situation,
    Step by step, knowin' me and you could make quite a duet,
    I could be your Romeo you my Juilet,
    Bonnie and Clyde of the 04' we ridin' off in the sunset,
    If your upset, bet I'll be right by your side,
    But for now we must divide,
    Get at me baby if you decide to ride.


    [End]



    Ending Comments:

    There it is everyone let me know what you think.


    Cheers,
    Ridiculous.
    Last edited by Ridiculous_Rick; 02-28-2004, 11:27 PM.
    7Digit
    UNTOUCHABLE LYRICISTZ

    You The Flyest Guy Walkin' That's Only Because I'm Seated

  • #2
    I realize this is really sort now that I read it and shit. I need to expand on it in more detail but if anyone could just gimme some feedback on it so far I also need to use a better rhyme scheme cause my rhyme patterns 8,6,4. What do you all usually perfer?
    7Digit
    UNTOUCHABLE LYRICISTZ

    You The Flyest Guy Walkin' That's Only Because I'm Seated

    Comment


    • #3
      Good vocab and rhymes, like you said, the flow and rhyme schemes needa be better, but all in all, very good lyrics. Keep it up. Peace
      The Big 4
      http://youtu.be/NMMUh37BWEE The Truth
      http://youtu.be/PT_j38VUAuE Rondo
      http://youtu.be/yhTKSdWRC0I KG
      http://youtu.be/3VhwzKGkvjg Ray

      Comment


      • #4
        thanks for the feedback. i'm tired of gettin' slept on i'm glad you like my lyrics. if anyone could help me with my rhyme patterns or teach me how I to right the right rhyme patterns I'd appericate. Bumpin for feedback.



        Ridiculous
        7Digit
        UNTOUCHABLE LYRICISTZ

        You The Flyest Guy Walkin' That's Only Because I'm Seated

        Comment


        • #5
          if a human could alwayz flow that evenly then he could be heavinly
          i give that double from 70
          iz dat sum cp?
          Originally posted by The Project
          I would suck a horse dry

          Originally posted by PH
          Wow ur such an asshole i hope u die or something
          lol wut?
          Originally posted by Kon
          v.a.- I love the double tap reps you do homie, haha...Weed>VA>all.

          Comment


          • #6
            thanks dawg, i'm not sure what you mean by double from 70 but it means a lot to know that you enjoyed my spit.

            Stay Up,
            Ridiculous.
            7Digit
            UNTOUCHABLE LYRICISTZ

            You The Flyest Guy Walkin' That's Only Because I'm Seated

            Comment


            • #7
              Bumpin for more feedback.
              7Digit
              UNTOUCHABLE LYRICISTZ

              You The Flyest Guy Walkin' That's Only Because I'm Seated

              Comment


              • #8
                blah i remembered when you use to have fun with this now it looks like a vocab battle man but whatever floats your boat right holla

                ridiculous

                ~late~

                Kansas
                City Chiefs: 5-3

                Los
                Angeles Lakers: 7-0

                Comment


                • #9
                  That was pretty tight, nice lyrics and rhymes and shit... Keep it up!

                  Peace

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    yeah nice rhymes and flow
                    but it was so short
                    so yeah keep writing
                    REpresting the CrAzY MinD3D MCs

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      good stuff
                      q

                      [SIZE=1][B]
                      [COLOR=DimGray]l
                      43-2-35

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        very nice lyrics.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          thats tight man. I know gotta put a little somethin up in it bout yo shortie's man. Cool Peace
                          TIMES OF CHAOS


                          Loonuhtik Lc// Hodgie//Black-Ball

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            ur flows a lil off but the wordplay is tight....keep writing maybe throw down a second verse and a lil chorus then u got urself a hit...paaaaaaaaaayce
                            Watch as the room rocks
                            Mentally moonwalk
                            Mixed media slang
                            Banging in your boom box verbal violence
                            Lyrical stylist
                            In a time when rock hip hop rhymes are childish
                            You cant tempt me with rhymes that are empty
                            Rapping to a beat doesnt make you an emcee
                            With your lack of skill and facility
                            Youre killing me
                            And a DJ in the group just for credibility

                            //\BATTLE RECORD//\ 4-0

                            \\/DEFEATED//\
                            Noxshus (KO)
                            Kg Tha Kid (KO)
                            Master-Minded (KO)
                            hallaatatlanta (KO)

                            STILL REPN THE BATTLE-AXE LABEL

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              bumpin
                              7Digit
                              UNTOUCHABLE LYRICISTZ

                              You The Flyest Guy Walkin' That's Only Because I'm Seated

                              Comment

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