yo im 13 i need ta be rated to know if i need ta step up

[Bt-Big_trouble]

we come round wit da ice round our neck//
bow on ya knees bitch please so sum respect//
this shits complatied//
its hard to see im under-rated its hard to be me//
gangsta up in ya face bout the when what where how?//
i would beat you an battle you but you dont-know-how//
i spit better an better each god damn day//
imma knock ya ass out in a gangsta way//
gangsta life is hard//
being dealt the wrong card doenst help either//
i aint nas but i aint afraide to talk bout ether//
so sit back, relax, an take a breather//
listen till this song done//
son, u might hurr sumthings u dun wanna hear//
might see sumthings that youll fo ever fear//
spread a tear, an cry for me//
but damn i know that mel would die for me//
im thank full fo that, i think im goin crazy baby just know that//
i love you girl now an forever no way i can thank you//
turn it up crank you juss listen to whhat i say//
life is hard livin in a gangsta way//
e-v-e-r-y-day its hard aint gettin no betta//
wake up 4 in da morning ya moms slanging for the chedder//
the nine, the beritta, the rifle, the vest//
goin against the best, been put to the test//
ive realized now, real friends help ya, they dun back down//
when you come around, they show love//
i thank the lord above, he show my the way//
in hard every day, living in a gangsta way//
me an will , tear up the bill, put down the crack//
now our ex's beggin for us back//
but cant you see, i knwo you never loved me//
buit now you see imma get in the rap game//
endin up ya ex boy got money, got fame//
but fuck it, suck it, the thing between ma legs//
give it to the one I LOVE, not da one who begs//

[Psycho69]

Well, for one, don't talk about that type of shit when you are only 13 lol.

[WHITEnight]

^^ lol

and yeah you need to step up

[Symptom]

ya, that rhyme kinda sucked.. but, i got the meaning you were trying to send out, just work more, practice makes perfect.

[spit it]

rap about wat happens in ya life...if you failed a test..w.rite a rap about that....your constipated...go for it....but not this bullshit, sorry,butt hats sum hypacritical crap rite there....u dotn do any of that....the beretta,chedda.....ok 50,calm down...just rite about reality man...PeAcE for now

[TiMmYrEcOrDz]

lol i remember my first song, it was so friggin wack. but dawg practice makes perfect. but dont b talkin bout that typa crap when your only 13 b/c you'll get hated on
HeAdRuSh

[Ebcommin]

lol you use rhyms to often and i like when peeps run with a rhyming word for like 6 bars u would run with a word for like 2 then switch it up not good turns people off still a little babieish but for 13 not bad

O and please dont rap about that stuff it makes u look fake like a suburban kid rappin about what he thinks would happen in the street just go with whats happenin in your life now if its entertaing or not, at least then youd be real.

[TiMmYrEcOrDz]

u rhyme like this

my names timmy and i rhyme like this
get me pissed ill show you my fist
look under my belt youll see a gun
see my finger see my thumb PLOW, its best to run


You dont hav no like.. advanced rhyming techniques, That song is completly the same scheme. Switch it up

[Clerks]

hahahah psycho said excatly wat i was gonna say

i spit better an better each god damn day//
imma knock ya ass out in a gangsta way//
gangsta life is hard//
being dealt the wrong card doenst help either//

i laughed...i mean, i jus cant see how bad of cards u got dealt.. when on your weekends your on d12world, on your computer, postin freestyles... i think that is a little takin advantage of the 'gangsta image'... jus my opinion...