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im just 14 ppl go easy lmfao

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  • im just 14 ppl go easy lmfao

    im livin in the streets of the ghetto of the 559
    gunz alwayz goin off,and the ladies are fine
    for some reason i dont want to live this life I live
    just want to cut my wrist and and straight up give....
    i want to drop this,give up,watch my life end
    i go up, face god he tells me all my sins,
    then drop straight down,...with a smile
    and not a frown,
    im glad i ended this shit
    i cant live this nomore
    everyday i get hit,
    i cant help it if im not how they want me to be....
    they should love me for me, and then theyll see
    that im not that bad,
    im not that weird
    they need to hear, what i got to say
    instead of yellin, and smackin me everyday
    im in the bed cant even move,they alwayz say they not in the mood
    this is why i did what i did, i did this, with no regrets
    they wont even know im lyin here bleedin i be, im in my bed and im
    practicly dead as to the devil my soul i sell
    as im here burnin in hell.
    DISTURBED KID IS BACK LIKE A MUTHA FUCKA

  • #2
    not bad, throughout ur raps u have to try to get more clever and lyrical. Try expanding your vocab and working with wordplays. Obviously now ur just rhyming words and expressing your feelings. Which is good. Everyone starts off that way. But from now on, work on little word plays like.....

    "I get so much head from my girl i poke her brain"

    ^ example

    And expandin the vocab, using more syllables and multies in ur rap, but dont try too hard now, ur still in the first stages, just keep writing until u get comfortable, but as u do it keep expanding, drop maybe a few wordplays in ur rhymes or w/e...... then as u get better u can use em through whole verses and shit.....
    The Big 4
    http://youtu.be/NMMUh37BWEE The Truth
    http://youtu.be/PT_j38VUAuE Rondo
    http://youtu.be/yhTKSdWRC0I KG
    http://youtu.be/3VhwzKGkvjg Ray

    Comment


    • #3
      it was okay but you definitely need to expand your vocabulay
      "This is paradise, I'm tellin' ya. This town like a great big pussy jus' waitin' to get fucked."

      Comment

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