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The Nightmare

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  • The Nightmare

    Startled abruptly awake from my sleep
    sweat on my brow
    pain swelling so deep
    within my chest
    my hearts beating fast...
    So how long can this nightmare really last ?!?

    I take a deep breathe as I look around
    and realize that all is safe and all is sound...
    I try to recall what startled me most...
    It's difficult with my mind racing full of fears
    as uncertainty quickly fills the air...

    I try to ignore it as I step outside
    When I realize everythings quiet and peaceful tonight.

    So I go in again...
    Lay back in my bed..
    Just as I doze off...
    I hear a voice in my head say...
    "Buckle Up Boy...Cause Here we go again..."

    KRK 8/02

  • #2
    ...........Errr..........Creeper shit

    Comment


    • #3
      Awwwww... Drunk Monkey... How might I consider that???? A compliment or just liquered werds?
      Nice of you to stagger through....

      Comment


      • #4
        dats pretty nutty dude. dont sleep too long. lol.

        Comment


        • #5
          really beginning to like your poetry
          it has a real dark feel to it, which i like
          nice one
          ... it's no surprise, that I got lost in your brown eyes ...

          Comment


          • #6
            Not bad, but I think it could be more effective with some imagery. Too much telling. Also, you establish a rhyme scheme in the beginning and then stray from it.
            Originally posted by SARSBOY
            report "w" word usage
            Somebody got beat up during recess way too much.

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            • #7
              That's cool... thanks...

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              • #8
                well it was nightmarish, & i get the experience so i like it too.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Short and to the point, I agree with the other poster, could of used some more imagery, but it wasn't bad the way it is right now, I liked it.

                  Nice job.
                  Now let the night be dark for all of me.
                  Let the night be too dark for me to see
                  Into the future. Let what will be, be.'

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                  • #10
                    It was different- i liked it! good job

                    and pleasent dreams 3;-)3
                    rb forever

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                    • #11
                      that was good.

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