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  • Just Something...

    im just fooling around with wordz and shit...



    My eyes are the window to my soul, take a long glance
    My joy and my sorrows embrace and begin a slowing dance
    Walking slowly in a space with no measurable dimensions
    Dry tears mark the paths of my intellecutal ascention
    Time elapses and minds contracted with serene visions
    A gory plight where beauty contrasts obsene incisions
    Malice is given, but eyes see the beauty that's hidden
    And I can clearly see the lust, that dressed in linen
    My sense's objective is precise like an optical weapon
    Vivid images painted in shades of cerulean and cresson
    Provoked emotions outline a soft, serene silhouette
    A distinct image, slightly tinted from a cigarette

    A valley encompassed on all sides by rugged ridges
    Scattered with rolling streams, by ways, and bridges
    Blades of grass dancing under a subtle moonlight
    An air of tranquil chaos, like the monsoon's eye
    The stream whispered secrets to the skies above
    And intertwined with the river making placid love
    The beauty hungered for it's own, a walking cannibal
    A faceless nights beauty, lay just beneath the mandible
    Vibrant shades of azure colored heaven's starry canvas
    They searched an atlas but no place existed at the axis
    The painting continued through the night with strokes
    And as the sun rose, the painting vanished like Roanoake

    Scattered showers carefully baptised the abandoned streets
    Nay sayers fill the crowd leavin kids with landed dreams
    A small child emerged meticulously from the violent masses
    Continued to an unset stage, walking slowly wearing glasses
    Nay sayers sprang to demons, the heathens were attacking
    The expressionless face burst into exuberant laughing
    The Demon's grasped the child but his smile never faded
    He symbolized the youths struggle how most never made it
    Something within gave him strength beyond the Child's control
    He shut his eyes in time to save the window to his dying soul

    i THINK I slipped on this...what yall think

    BreathEZ


    [W-88][L-3][KO's-80]


    Originally posted by RikoChet
    LoL.. Yea I Thought Ori was the ghostwriter for everyone that ever had a good bar on this site...

  • #2
    ...i really had to picture what you were saying to understand it. so in a way it was pretty good. but yea lots of big words.

    Comment


    • #3
      I don't believe you dropped the ball. You had a flow of words and kept to it. The soul is a subject many find difficult to describe. Though you know it is there many can not see the energy. It is not grasped easily ...no... It took a couple of reads to see what you described. Though at first I got lost I read it again and realized the subject doesnt really change yet describes you in different phases. That is the beauty of this art, you set yourself free through the words of poetic grace.

      If you have never scene the movie " What dreams may come..." You may want to check it out...
      It's deep like your poem that naturally came to you.
      Nice Job

      Comment


      • #4
        yo...wat do u mean by,..u dont beleive i dropped the ball?

        anyways...

        ^at last a person that feel's my poem's...lol yeah i think i made the poem very
        dificult for peep's to understand wat i was trying to do was to put words together
        to make it more complex making the meaning shorter of wat i was trying put out
        i dont know thats is just my style of writing...

        TANKS HOLMES MUCH LOVE ON THE FEED....

        BreathEZ


        [W-88][L-3][KO's-80]


        Originally posted by RikoChet
        LoL.. Yea I Thought Ori was the ghostwriter for everyone that ever had a good bar on this site...

        Comment


        • #5
          complex but to the right reader it's simple

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by krkryptwalker
            That is the beauty of this art, you set yourself free through the words of poetic grace.

            If you have never scene the movie " What dreams may come..." You may want to check it out...
            It's deep like your poem that naturally came to you.
            Nice Job
            for sure krkryptwalker.

            anyway.....-Daz- wowwhee...here pass the dutchie 'round.

            Comment

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