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always by your grave

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  • always by your grave

    Dear jaime,
    i wrote you this letter you'll never recive.i set it by your grave while i'm praying on my knee.I run my fingers across your name.to hear your faint voice of that song you once sang.i try to play tag with you everyday,you never taged back,but it's what you would say.i brought flowers on your birthday,and slept their every night.knowing your their takes away all my fright. you never come to my birthdays even when you got the invite.i go to see if you opened it and to see if your alright.you never opened it,it's just sitting on your grave.but that's ok i got real pictures that i'll always save.as another birthday goes by, and your not their.i squeeze the friendship neckles that wewould both wear.i'd close my eyes and pray you would come.i opened my eyes and saw someone.then they dissapeered they weren't in sight.now i feel better because you read your invite.

    the end dedicated to a good friend jaime ives we all luv u

  • #2
    Wow......deep stuff, I'm feeling you on this one girl!......good job...
    YoU Can'T HurT wHat'S No lONger ThERe.... wITh nO heArT...I dOn't FUCKEN CARE

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    • #3
      i really like it
      its very very personal
      it had a real good flow to it
      can get a sense of the hurt you feel from losing them
      it's great
      nice work
      ... it's no surprise, that I got lost in your brown eyes ...

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      • #4
        Originally posted by SneakySnufflez
        i really like it
        its very very personal
        it had a real good flow to it
        can get a sense of the hurt you feel from losing them
        it's great
        nice work

        That was a very good poem. Please someone listen sorry for only posting.

        Im 19 live in a old house and my family hate's me for it. But all at the same time I still wished that they loved me. But there is this one person that make's it worse for me. I sit in my room crying all of the time. I see them shine and they hate me for trying to shine also. All ive ever wanted was a man a life and my big dream. But there are these people are out for a big money skeem. All it seem's for me is heart ache.Yes I know noone is perfect. I made mistake's. But there are people that make's mistake's also. I try to do better but still noone want's to write me a love letter. So then my heart twerk's and my eye even start's to jerk. Yes it's crazy but i still don't feel amazeing. I feel blessed sometime's but then every time I pick myself up I still feel like it isn't good enough. So I hurt and then there come's the push and shove. But all at the same time im still haveing to where these glove's. It's nothing but love and trust from god above. please someone show me some love. But still there is still push and shove. Yeah why pain and this game and why do I have to be so damn a shamed. I also feel that when it rain's out side that the sun is not going to ever shine and I feel like a five instead of a dime trust me ive only really been in 8 just waiting for that right one wich is going to be my nine. I want a family also but no one want's to fill my tummy so my baby can look at me and say yummy.



        Crazy huh? Now does anyone really like my writing ,or am I just be lied to?
        Last edited by Missfit; 03-15-2005, 01:22 PM.

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        • #5
          ^You gotta make your own threads for your writing
          it would bring more attention to it
          and you would get better responses
          this thread is for responses on "Always by your grave"
          get a title for you poem, make a new thread
          ... it's no surprise, that I got lost in your brown eyes ...

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          • #6
            Okay ive tryed to make my own thread and write but still everone ignore's me and I know that already. Or I wouldn't have sad please sorry for only posting. My head hurt's and your killing it.

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            • #7
              make your own thread seriously. you gotta give it time an up it if it doesnt get responses at first.
              ... it's no surprise, that I got lost in your brown eyes ...

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              • #8
                In response to the original poem in this thread, WOW. That moved me. Sometimes it's really hard to express feelings/emotions through poetry, simply because the version is condensed vs. writing stories or journals. Even when you base your poems on a particular emotion, sometimes the poem leaves something to be desired for the reader because they didn't experience what the writer did when they wrote the poem. But this poem doesn't leave anything to confusion. I got exactly what you were saying, and could "feel" what you wrote about. Excellent. Keep it up, and sorry for your loss if it was written off of personal experience.
                Life is what you make it.

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                • #9
                  In response to the poem posted within this thread by "MissFit", it was a really good attempt. I did get what you were trying to express, but work on trying to make it flow more. I agree that you should try to make your own threads, and if you feel everyone ignores you, I won't. Assuming I'm online, I check the poetry forum about once a day, so if no one else replies to give you a little criticism, then I give you my word that I will. As far as everyone else goes, I don't really think anyone is trying to ignore you, but I could be wrong. Generally, however, it takes some time to sit and read through these poems much less to reply to all of them. So, please don't feel left out. Once you post your own thread, keep an eye on the far left column that shows how many times your poem has been viewed. If it makes you feel any better, I don't get a whole lot of replies myself. It could be that you and I just aren't as established as the members who get 3 and 4 pages of replies. So, keep trying and keep up the good work.
                  Life is what you make it.

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                  • #10
                    thanx it was a sad thing she was1 of ky friends i lost lots of people in my life just talking to someone for a little bit of time can make cry forever if they died.

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                    • #11
                      You're quite welcome, and you have my condolences. I know it doesn't seem so right now, but it will get better. Unfortunately, pain is something no one avoids in their life. I don't know if you already "talk" to your friend at night before you go to bed, but if not, maybe you could start. I seems silly to some, but it's a good way of closure. And, if you believe in life after death, then it will also bring comfort from knowing that your friend will "hear" what you are saying to her. They say God and spirits speak to you in your dreams, so be on the lookout for your friend. When you smell a scent that reminds you of your friend, take a moment to really remember her and whatever that scent is attributed to.....you'd be surprised how much it helps. I know it's sad to think of your friend never being there in the physical sense anymore, and to think of how much you've lost by her dying. But, you have gained by ever having her in your life to begin with, and you will always be blessed with the memories you have of her. Keep your chin up, and God bless.
                      Life is what you make it.

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                      • #12
                        that was very touching u should write a poem like that.i always write about death cause i grew up with it-missy

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                        • #13
                          Everyone knows that death is just a natural part of life. It is painful for those left behind to deal with when someonedying, especially someone close dies. However, remembering them for who they are, instead of the circumstances surrounding their death or that fact that their gone does help in an unbelievable way to alleviate the pain you are feeling. I'm sorry to hear that you grew up in an environment that made you adapt to death. I'm sure it made you a stronger person in the long run. Best wishes - Melinda
                          Life is what you make it.

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