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  • Dont Do Stupid Sh!t Like Me

    1) Do not get drunk and talk to other peoples girlfriends

    2) Do not stick your fingers in cigar cutters when your drunk just because someone said "hey stick your finger in here

    3) Do not ride a bike in the ice, or slick snow when you have a thorn patch at the end of your driveway

    4) In conjunction with number 3, do not ride a overly small bike down a steep hill and over a large speed bump

    5) Despite what we all like to think, not EVERYTHING is smokable

    6) Don't throw frisbee's at lit lightbulbs

    7) Eating a one pound block of cheese is not good either

    8) Don't take pills just because they are there

    9) Don't get drunk and run around naked at a shopping center

    10) Yes gasoline smells good, but don't smell it for too long

    11) check the expiration date on orange juice before making shooters

    12) No you can't clean up all that glass after throwing plates of the balcony

    13) It is not fun to dance on the roof despite the thrill

    14) Most cat's have claws so don't blow in their face just because they make a funny face

    15) Avoid animals when on XTC

    16) REALLY avoid tree's when on XTC

    17) If they are hot and drunk, they probably have a boyfriend that is big and drunk

    18) Watch who you make the "that person is runnin like a *** in poland '45" crack to

    19) If you see a homeless guy that looks like he's dead, don't try to wake him up

    20) and don't laugh at him either

    21) Just because they are wearing sunglasses doesn't mean they are blind

    22) Empty paintball guns + old people = probation

    23) Don't hit shopping carts with your car, as fun as it may seem

    24) No it's not fun to get drunk and hit your drunk friend in the face with a champaign cork

    25) Do not burn things in the bathroom

    26) Although making dale earnhardt's death jokes can be quite amusing, do not make them to large burly black truck drivers

    27) A pellet gun CAN kill a dog

    28) Once again i need to stress not getting drunk and talking to your friends girlfriend

    29) don't show up at your friends house with a bottle of jack daniels in your hand, sometimes their parents are home

    30) Think about this when your a pedestrian "No that car probably can't see me coming around the corner"

    31) Paint thinner is very flammable

    32) "Hey let's just dump the gas directly from the can to the burn barrel"...no don't do that either

    33) No cops believe "we were just going to hardee's" at 2 am

    34) Getting blitzed and knocking on random peoples doors at 11 pm results in angry man with pistol

    35) The first place your parents look for weed is your top drawer

    36) And as good as a hiding place as it sounds, the second place they look is above the door frame in the inside of your closet

    37) Yes those goofy fake wrestling moves really do hurt

    38) That girls parents WERE serious about "no cum stains in my car or im gonna bust your nose in" they meant that, really

    39) Yes even if it's a mom saying that

    40) Don't tempt drunk friends to "Spray me with that mace, i ****ing dare you" Because they are plastered and they will

    41) Your parents don't believe (really) that your using that lighter for candles

    42) Those floor fans in your room, they are moving faster then you think even if your tripping, the cover is there for a reason

    43) If you work at a fast food place, and someone pulls up to the drive through and gets all cockey, don't spit in their food give it to them and say **** off goat ****er under your breath because they may be your grandparents.

    44) Girls know your not bending down underneath your desk JUST to get your pencil...

    45) Just IGNORE those people who are selling you bootlegs in a nyc subway, don't get pissy at them, they probably have knives

    46) A pellet gun can go through shoe leather too you know...

    47) This isn't TV, the bottles don't break peoples heads, they give them concussions

    48) The first time you have a sexual encounter with a woman, make sure you can see what your doing, the small one's probably the ass hole

    49) Sticking your **** in the vaccum cleaner hurts

    50) Warm apple pie does not feel like *****.

    lol i get these off another forum.
    dO tHe DrUg DoNt LeT tHe DrUg Do YoU

  • #2
    lol ill remember that

    Comment


    • #3
      one time on boxing day all the family met up for a party and my cousin brought his girlfriend, i was wasted out of my skull and started chatting her up, before i passed out on her lap and my cousin dumped her right there. fact.

      Comment


      • #4
        haha
        THE CAKE IS A LIE
        THE CAKE IS A LIE
        THE CAKE IS A LIE
        THE CAKE IS A LIE

        XBox Live-De4dly R4pture
        Ill SHIT on you!!!!

        Comment


        • #5
          Good shit.
          These are the days of anyone being blonde, the days of mind convincing, a time of gold and uncertainty, noise and expensive genetic victory.
          The information age and all its molecular pimping.

          Comment


          • #6
            *bump*
            dO tHe DrUg DoNt LeT tHe DrUg Do YoU

            Comment


            • #7
              Don't get high before SAT like I did in 12th grade, shit was fucked UP!
              Everybody was born to hustle
              It's a very thin line between a boss and a muscle
              - Xzibit

              Comment


              • #8
                Don't try and shit in a bad no matter how easy it looks.
                =W=
                My other aliases:
                On The Shelf
                Masai
                justp1ayin
                TheMan

                Comment


                • #9
                  Dont trust ALL your friends
                  smoke weed

                  Chill.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    good shit
                    Difficult takes a day, Impossible takes a week

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      lol..nice tips
                      Life isn't worth living if you don't have something you'd die for.


                      Never attempt to change who you are to become someone you're not.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by alex1089
                        1) Do not get drunk and talk to other peoples girlfriends

                        2) Do not stick your fingers in cigar cutters when your drunk just because someone said "hey stick your finger in here

                        3) Do not ride a bike in the ice, or slick snow when you have a thorn patch at the end of your driveway

                        4) In conjunction with number 3, do not ride a overly small bike down a steep hill and over a large speed bump

                        5) Despite what we all like to think, not EVERYTHING is smokable

                        6) Don't throw frisbee's at lit lightbulbs

                        7) Eating a one pound block of cheese is not good either

                        8) Don't take pills just because they are there

                        9) Don't get drunk and run around naked at a shopping center

                        10) Yes gasoline smells good, but don't smell it for too long

                        11) check the expiration date on orange juice before making shooters

                        12) No you can't clean up all that glass after throwing plates of the balcony

                        13) It is not fun to dance on the roof despite the thrill

                        14) Most cat's have claws so don't blow in their face just because they make a funny face

                        15) Avoid animals when on XTC

                        16) REALLY avoid tree's when on XTC

                        17) If they are hot and drunk, they probably have a boyfriend that is big and drunk

                        18) Watch who you make the "that person is runnin like a *** in poland '45" crack to

                        19) If you see a homeless guy that looks like he's dead, don't try to wake him up

                        20) and don't laugh at him either

                        21) Just because they are wearing sunglasses doesn't mean they are blind

                        22) Empty paintball guns + old people = probation

                        23) Don't hit shopping carts with your car, as fun as it may seem

                        24) No it's not fun to get drunk and hit your drunk friend in the face with a champaign cork

                        25) Do not burn things in the bathroom

                        26) Although making dale earnhardt's death jokes can be quite amusing, do not make them to large burly black truck drivers

                        27) A pellet gun CAN kill a dog

                        28) Once again i need to stress not getting drunk and talking to your friends girlfriend

                        29) don't show up at your friends house with a bottle of jack daniels in your hand, sometimes their parents are home

                        30) Think about this when your a pedestrian "No that car probably can't see me coming around the corner"

                        31) Paint thinner is very flammable

                        32) "Hey let's just dump the gas directly from the can to the burn barrel"...no don't do that either

                        33) No cops believe "we were just going to hardee's" at 2 am

                        34) Getting blitzed and knocking on random peoples doors at 11 pm results in angry man with pistol

                        35) The first place your parents look for weed is your top drawer

                        36) And as good as a hiding place as it sounds, the second place they look is above the door frame in the inside of your closet

                        37) Yes those goofy fake wrestling moves really do hurt

                        38) That girls parents WERE serious about "no cum stains in my car or im gonna bust your nose in" they meant that, really

                        39) Yes even if it's a mom saying that

                        40) Don't tempt drunk friends to "Spray me with that mace, i ****ing dare you" Because they are plastered and they will

                        41) Your parents don't believe (really) that your using that lighter for candles

                        42) Those floor fans in your room, they are moving faster then you think even if your tripping, the cover is there for a reason

                        43) If you work at a fast food place, and someone pulls up to the drive through and gets all cockey, don't spit in their food give it to them and say **** off goat ****er under your breath because they may be your grandparents.

                        44) Girls know your not bending down underneath your desk JUST to get your pencil...

                        45) Just IGNORE those people who are selling you bootlegs in a nyc subway, don't get pissy at them, they probably have knives

                        46) A pellet gun can go through shoe leather too you know...

                        47) This isn't TV, the bottles don't break peoples heads, they give them concussions

                        48) The first time you have a sexual encounter with a woman, make sure you can see what your doing, the small one's probably the ass hole

                        49) Sticking your **** in the vaccum cleaner hurts

                        50) Warm apple pie does not feel like *****.

                        lol i get these off another forum.
                        like you ever done that shit....your like 14 years old...and if you did you are a stupid peice of shit.
                        aim:TillDeath1028
                        yahoo: freakonaleash6981
                        lived life so cold i live with my wrist under a knife lived so cold that my tears turn into ice.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          good lookin on the things not to do.

                          and to think, i was just about to ride a small bike down a steep hill
                          i have a belly full of white dog poop and you lay this shit on me?

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            lol that was funny
                            http://www.cashcrate.com/280596
                            MAKE EASY MONEY ONLINE, REALLY, ITS EASY ASSHOLES

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              51. Don't waste valuable minutes of your life reading this thread.
                              (imwstupid

                              Comment

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